Let it commence. Let the horror and the sadness and the outrage congeal. Let them seep through our bodies at will. Let us wallow in the unjustness and the horror of it all. Let us question the uncaring and selfish God who allowed this to happen.
Yes, the Los Angeles Lakers have been swept and summarily dismissed from the NBA post-season.
As inconceivable as it seems, the undefeated Lakers were swept by a godless, eighth-seeded team not from Los Angeles, who went 41 – 41 or something. (I don't know—and who cares, anyway?) But they are most certainly not the Lakers. Their shorts aren't even yellow!
The Lakers' 2022/23 campaign was a wire-to-wire thrill ride as they demolished one opponent after another. They constituted a league all by themselves! They deigned to play in the NBA only because a more-celestial option wasn't available.
If you contest any of these facts, you need only to consult the media reports. The Lakers were pre-ordained for greatness. As illustrated by their undefeated season, they had no competition! LeBron James could play with four third-graders and win a title by himself!
And then the post-season began. After slaughtering the Memphis Grizzlies and the Golden State Warriors in consecutive four-game sweeps, they faced off against the legacy-free team not from Los Angeles.
Only four games left until the NBA Finals!
The media remained agog as the Lakers triumphed over both their previous opponents, decisively triumphing in what now amounted to ninety consecutive games! 'Unprecedented' hardly seemed sufficient.
Given their dominance, it wasn't long before the conspiracy theories began. The Lakers were using fans to referee their games. The Lakers supplied unknown substances to the opposition's best players, rendering them unable to play. On and on they went.
The media attempted to refute these groundless accusations. They repeated their mantra endlessly. “They're the Lakers! They're the Lakers! They're the Lakers! They are the face of destiny!”
They went on to name all five starters to the All-NBA Team. Likewise the All-Defensive team. They attempted to name each Laker Rookie of the Year, but for unknown reasons this was not allowed to proceed.
Yes, more indisputable proof that everyone hates the Lakers.
Then the Lakers lost game one of the Western Conference Finals. The outrage was tangible. The media cried and cried. “They would have won that game except for...” I don't believe anyone with a grain or two of sentience would call it journalism.
Collectively, these reports were a rant from a spoiled child. A child upset that, despite their pronouncements, the Lakers could lose. In particular to a rag tag bunch of heathens not from Los Angeles. Oh, the indignity!
And then it happened after game two. And again after game three. Depending on the account, it was sometimes difficult to ascertain who the Lakers' opponent was. The media's wailing over their beloved Lakers was insufferable.
And after last night, you can well imagine. While it is difficult to confirm who will be representing the Western Conference in the NBA Finals, finding out who will not is easier than spending money. In other words, win or lose—the story is the Lakers.
I wear my disdain for them (and their fans) with everlasting pride.
