The
re-make is Hollywood's biggest cliché. Even moreso than sequels and
happy endings. And streets wetted down for nighttime shots. Or the
inevitable scantily-clad prostitute being paraded by whenever the script
calls for a police station interior.
(And
while I'm at it, anyone recall a neighborhood shot that didn't
include a dog barking in the distance? Me neither.)
The re-make is Hollywood's equivalent of carry-on baggage fees;
cash grabs with no reason for being other than to puff-up a coterie
of wallets. While they occur with the numbing regularity of sunrise,
re-makes rarely surpass the original.
There
are, of course, exceptions. John Huston's debut—The Maltese
Falcon—is one. Howard Hawks' brilliant take on The Front
Page (His Girl Friday) is another. And Richard Lester's
1973 reboot of The Three Musketeers successfully
injected humor into the classic.
In
the twenty-first century, The Thomas Crown Affair and The
Painted Veil proved re-makes don't have to be a thoughtless
whoring-out of the creative process or the shameless exploitation of
those who love movies.
But on the whole, re-makes are just tarted-up and louder versions of
the original that leave one asking “Why?”
Which
brings me to the latest take on A Star Is Born.
There
are millions of millennials to whom this story will appear new. And
the presence of Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper will have millions more
swiping their credit cards and passing legal tender through box
office windows.
As
a marketing exercise, it is unassailable. But as a cinematic one? Not
so much.
Beyond
providing a nice payday for all involved, what's the point? It was
told to perfection in 1954 and remains a classic.
But
imagine the poor millennial who, forced to watch it, would remain unmoved simply because the characters don't carry i-Phones or
use words like devastated. Bradley Cooper and company certainly have.
Half
the fun I had pursuing my love of books and music and movies was
getting outside of my comfort zone and delving into a time (or even a culture) well outside of my own. It gave my own
life context and deepened my understanding on how we came to arrive
at this point in the fashion that we did.
It
taught me that we are more alike than different. Long story short, it
stretched me.
Catering
to short attention spans, presentism and a distaste for history
sentences us to the kind of myopia that infests our political
landscape, where our ignorance of anything that exists outside of our sphere of familiarity frequently curdles into suspicion and
fear.
Even
if it could benefit us. Even if we could learn from it.
In
1869, Mark Twain wrote in Innocents Abroad “Travel is fatal
to prejudice, bigotry and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people
need it sorely. Broad, wholesome, charitable views can not be
acquired by vegetating in one's little corner of Earth.”
Stream
the classic 1954 version on Netflix. Check out the DVD from your
local library. Please. Pretend life is a Nike commercial and just do
it.
You
won't even need a yoga mat.
