Death by Republican

Dear Lockdown Protester,

Suffering this tyrannical assault on your civil liberties must be very painful. As are the tyrannical measures which kept you alive. Let me say how very sorry I am.

How thoughtless of the rest of us.

To paraphrase a sign seen at several protests: “My health doesn't end where your impatience begins!”

Reasoned, well thought-out measures were put into place by people way smarter than us to simultaneously protect us and prevent the spread of this highly-contagious virus. Measures like requiring a state show a sustained, two-week decline in COVID19 infections before it be considered for re-opening.

But someone on Facebook told you that was stupid—even fearful, so it is.

We have yet to test even two-percent of the population. Again, people way smarter than us feel capriciously re-opening densely populated urban areas because we're anxious and bored amounts to posting I heart COVID19 memes on our social media accounts.

You don't want it to leave. You want it to stick around, like it was Tom Brady or Laura Ingraham that dropped in and you can't bear to see it/them depart. How will normalcy ever be the same after a celebrity crush has popped in?

Look on the bright-side. Your president has mandated that meat processing plants remain open despite being confirmed hot spots for COVID19 infections. You can feed your death wish by consuming all the pork, poultry and beef these plants can crank out, and your survivors won't be able to sue thanks to your president's generous offer of immunity.

What a great leap forward towards the dystopia you so obviously crave.

I haven't seen a breakdown, but I suspect most of you are Republicans. Again, I apologize for your continued existence. I am as unhappy about it as you are.

To the woman who said “We can't pay taxes when we're dead”, I offer this: We won't be able to engineer a better, safer way forward, either.

I pray we are able to manage the second wave better than we did the first. Practice, I am told,  makes perfect.


Sincerely,

La Piazza Gancio